Wednesday, April 2, 2008
CAPRICORN, the Goat December 22nd through January 20소
How to Recognize CAPRICORN
"You are old. Father William." the young man said,
"And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your headr-
Do you think, at your age, it is right?"
It's anything but a breeze to grasp the Capricorn character. You'll learn to recognize this Sun sign, but you'll need some preliminary practice. Study the quiet spider in the comer. He hasn't a chance against the fast-flying insects. But they get caught in his cleverly spun web-and the spider wins. Remember Aesop's slow tortoise, humorously crawling in that race. He hasn't a chance against the quick, bright hare. But the flighty hare goes in all directions, forgetting the goal-the tortoise wins. Observe the goat, as he scales the mountainside. He hasn't a chance against the strategy of the smarter humans who pursue him. But the hunters fall behind as the sturdy goat climbs determinedly from crag to crag on his uniquely designed hooves-and the goat wins.
Now study a Capricorn. Where will you find him? Just about anywhere he can advance or improve himself. Anywhere he can get ahead and further his secret ambitions. Try a social gathering. The Capricorn is not a carefree party type, but the goat we're studying is a social climber as well as a mountain climber. Pick a mixed group, preferably in the upper income level. You can also try the middle income level, but the lower you go beneath that, the smaller your chances of finding a Capricorn. He probably won't be wearing a lamp shade on his head, tap dancing or calling attention to himself in any way; he'll be the admiring spectator in the background. You may not even notice him at first as he quietly and calmly watches all the flashy, pushy, charming, aggressive and brilliant personalities around him. Everyone in the group will seem to have superior equipment for the race-any race. Lots of them are bluffing, some of them are afraid, but they're all highly polished, and the Capricorn doesn't seem to have a chance against them. Yet, he will win.
A couple of years ago, I visited the bookstore of a New York astrologer. As I carelessly scattered my gems of wisdom, gave him unsolicited advice about what books he should stock, and argued astrological theory with him, I learned he was a Capricorn and he learned I was an Aries. Smugly, I guessed his correct ascendant, talked faster, moved faster and seemed to dominate the scene. Before I left, he gave me a charming, gentle smile, and in a fascinating Hungarian accent, he said a funny thing. He said, "Capricorn will always triumph over Aries. The goat will win over the ram." It was spoken lightly, but he was quite serious. Outside the bookstore, I laughed to myself. "Imagine such conceit," I thought. "No one can top a double Aries." Know what? When I can't find certain books I need that have been out of print since Noah built the ark, the Capricorn comes up with them. Gradually, I've been forced to pay respectful tribute to his superiority. Now here I am crediting his Sun sign with qualities I envy, but don't possess. You see? Capricorn won.
Another confession. As an Aries, I hate to take direction. No Aries writer can stand to have anyone edit his work. Recently, it was suggested that a Capricorn woman go over some material I had written. I was infuriated. Outwardly I agreed, but secretly I decided that she wasn't going to change a single word of the product of my genius. I would only pretend to go along. She made her suggestions quietly, almost timidly, and against my will I saw only too clearly how intelligent they were. Why hadn't I thought of cutting that phrase and changing that word myself? After I had grudgingly followed her instructions to the letter, the improvement in the material was painfully obvious. Capricorn won again.
I've finally made up my aggressive Aries mind that it's no use to fight them. You might as well do the same thing. Pity the high pressure salesman who sizes up his Capricorn pigeon and thinks, "This guy is a pushover. I can sell him the Brooklyn Bridge." He has a lot to leam.
Since the goat merges into the group so gently, unconsciously camouflaging himself into the background, it's not always easy to recognize the physical characteristics of this Sun sign. Capricoms can be stocky and muscular, thin and wiry or plump and soft. But no matter how the body is shaped, the goat will give the impression of being rooted to the spot, until he decides to move to another spot. Generally, Satum people have straight, lank, dark hair, dark, steady eyes, and swarthy olive or tan complexions. You'll see Capricoms with curly blonde hair and blue eyes, but watch them closely. Honestly now, don't they really look as if they should have been born with dark hair, eyes and skin? It's a delicate point, but valid. Take Marlene Die-trich, for example. Dresden china complexion, green eyes and corn silk hair. Look again. Observe her calm, deliberate actions. Listen to her deep, throaty voice. Note her legendary tough business head and her earthy ambition. Aren't these more synonomous with the steady, reliable image of a brunette? Master this subtlety and you'U never be fooled by the appearance of a Capricorn.
There's always a faint aura of melancholy and seriousness surrounding the Saturn personality. None of them completely escape the Saturnine influence of stem discipline and self-denial. Many Capricorns have strong feet and wear sensible shoes. Their hands are capable, their voices usually even and soothing-and you'll probably notice a gentleness that flatters and persuades. Caprieorns can look and act as harmless as a feather quilt, but they're as tough as a keg of nails. They hammer away persistently, relentlessly, managing to digest insults, pressures, disappointments and duty as calmly as the goat digests rusty cans, broken glass and cardboard. Like him, they have iron stomachs and dangerous horns. While the gay, laughing extroverts scatter their energies hither and yon, Capricorns never deviate an inch to the left or right. They steadily follow the upward path, with inbred faith in the security of the well-traveled road, and contempt for the enticing short cuts they know are full of pitfalls.
Capricorns have an enormous admiration for those who have preceded them to the top of the mountain, and who have laid down the laws for the journey. They court success; they respect authority and honor tradition. Lots of energetic, impulsive people label them snobbish and stuffy. The goat could conversely label his critics rash and foolish, but usually he's too wise to make unnecessary enemies by indulging in such self-defense. The Saturn-ruled submit. They agree. They adapt. Or do they just appear to do so? Capricorn allows others to walk in front of him, but he often gets there first, against all logic. He's careful to avoid the obstacles, the sharp rocks. No wonder he seldom stumbles. His eyes aren't fastened on the stars. He keeps his gaze fastened ahead, and his feet firmly planted on the ground. Jealousy, passion, impulse, anger, frivolity, waste, laziness, carelessness-are all obstacles. Let others trip and fall over them. Not Capricorn. He may glance briefly behind him with pity for the failures, or in grateful tribute for past advice and help, but he'll soon continue his steady upward climb until his goal is reached.
There are Capricorns who are deliciously romantic- who understand the strange light of the moon and the glorious colors of the butterfly's wing. But they won't let their emotions blind them to the facts. Not if they're typical Saturn people. If Capricorn writes a lovely poem, full of imagination and illusion, the theme will be solid and the punctuation will be correct. It will come to the point, and the sentiment will never be allowed to slosh over the edges. Don't defy the conventions if you want the respect of the goat. Even the more daring ones, and they are the exceptions, will observe at least the outer trappings of social acceptability. Public scenes and raw, naked, uncontrolled passions embarrass them.
y An occasional Capricorn will forget to hide his ambition, and refuse to work unless he's at the head of things. Then he becomes a stubborn goat who insists on starting at the top of the ladder, where he feels he belongs. Naturally, such an attitude produces a gloomy, pessimistic, cold and selfish person who's impossible to satisfy. But a couple of hard bumps usually suffice to set him on the right path.
Young Capricorns are typically more contented than older Capricorns, and there's a good reason. In almost Chinese-fashion, the Saturn-ruled youngsters idolize ancestors and elders. Respect for the wisdom of age and experience is ingrained in the Saturnine nature. When they mature and the "honorable ancestors" and the old folks are gone, the wild actions of the modern generation can frighten and bewilder the conservative goats. They go about saying, "Teh, tch!" shaking their heads and murmuring about the good old days. Luckily, however, a fair percentage of them adapt to meet the challenge. It's a warm thing to watch a gray-haired Capricorn cheerfully cavorting with youth, learning for the first time the joys of childhood he missed as a serious youngster. Older Capricorns either behave like frustrated dill pickles, or they happfly roll hoops and dance the boogaloo. A few of them, caught in the uncomfortable middle, grin with suppressed excitement as they sit on the sidelines and tap their feet in time to the music, but never quite gather the courage to jump on the carousel.
You'll seldom find the straight, well-shaped Capricorn
nose stuck in other people's business or the Saturn tongue wagging in gossip. If the Sun sign is combined with afflicted Gemini or Pisces influences, there may be a little gabbiness, but normally they're content to mind their own affairs. They won't often hand out unsolicited advice, but when you deliberately seek their practical wisdom, they won't hesitate to give it with stem overtones. They'll expect you to accept it, too. The Capricorn has learned to cope with duty and responsibility and to tolerate frustration. If you can't follow his example, he'll waste little time trying to teach you, and allow you only a pinch of sympathy.
You may read that Capricoms marry for money or social position. That's an exaggeration, though I will say that it was doubtless a Capricorn who remarked, "It's just as easy to fall in love with the conductor as it is to have a fling with the second violin." The practical goat rarely leaps into business or marriage unless he's prepared financially for the former and emotionally for the latter. These people will do strange things for security. Old age is constantly on the Saturnine mind. Even the young Capricoms will instinctively enjoy visiting Uncle Jasper or Aunt Minerva. After all, the doting relatives might have a few bonds or some property, besides the fact that they're comfortable and familiar. One certainly wouldn't want to see a fortune willed to a pet canary. You may think such an attitude is cold and calculating, but to the Capricorn, it's sensible. Opportunity never has to knock twice at the goat's door. He'll hear the first knock. In fact, he's been leaning against the door, listening and waiting for it.
In childhood, Capricoms are inclined to be weaker, more sickly than other youngsters, but both strength and resistance to disease increase with age. The sober, temperate nature of the typical goat gives him amazing endurance- and such potential for survival that it's not unusual to find him living past the century mark. Saturn people should be able to avoid doctors and hospitals, but they don*t, because fear, uncertainty, worry and gloom are deadlier than germs. No amount of practical diet, conservative habits and stubborn resistance to illness can overcome the dangers of pessimism. Capricoms who want to avoid sickness should have plenty of outdoor exercise, and develop a more positive, outgoing personality. The fresh air of the country and the fresh breezes of tolerance will work magic with Saturnine health. Almost all goats of both sexes have sensitive skin. There may be nervous rashes, allergies, roughness and chapping, some peculiarity of perspiration, enlarged pores or acne. Stomach disorders from incompatible foods and mental distress are common. Broken arms and legs may occur. The knee caps, joints and bones are vulnerable areas, and psychosomatic paralysis, severe headaches and kidney infections are further fruits of Saturnine melancholy.
They will either have beautiful, white, strong-teeth-or constant problems with decay and continual visits to the dentist, one or the other. Generally speaking, if they avoid the lingering illnesses caused by lingering depressions, the Capricorn tenacity for life is remarkable. But it's no fun to be the last leaf on the tree if you're suffering from arthritis and rheumatism. The goat must seek the sunlight and laugh at the rain to stay healthy.
He's such a shy, sweet soul, a trifle stubborn perhaps, but gentle about it. He seems so harmless. What a safe person to trust and confide in-how pleasantly he builds your ego. Who could hurt him or suspect him of ambition? All the while, Capricorn is using your own weaknesses, conceits and jealousies to make himself stronger. He's useful and eventually so indispensable that you ask him to take over the reins. Then hell rule unobtrusively in the corner, modestly pulling the strings of authority. The goat submerges his ego to gain what his ego truly desires-the position of the real leader. With kindly, but stem, cautious wisdom he guards the past from neglect and protects the present from confusion, so you can build tomorrow safely.
He doesn't have to lead the parade with a big brass band. He gives permission for the parade, and plans its route from behind the scenes. All the daring high-wire acts need the Capricorn's strong, safe net when they miscalculate and tumble. The discipline and formality of jet black and navy blue-the solid practicality of brown-the deep, honest dreams of dark green-these are the quiet colors of his enduring rainbow. Walk slowly through his silent forest, carpeted in soft moss and climbing ivy-and seek the eight hidden treasures of Saturn. Rich, red rubies lie buried beneath the Capricorn, weeping willow. Stay- and leam the eternal beauty of the pure, smooth onyx. Capricorn lead is solid, and Capricorn coal builds lasting fires.
Famous Capricorn Personalities
Martin Luther King Rudyard Kipling Mao Tse-tung Henry Miller Isaac Newton Richard Nixon Louis Pasteur Edgar Allan Poe Helena Rubinstein Carl Sandburg Albert Schweitzer Daniel Webster Woodrow Wilson
Steve Alien Humphrey Bogart Pablo Casals Nat King Cole Benjamin Franklin Ava Gardner Barry Goldwater Cary Grant Alexander Hamilton J. Edgar Hoover Howard Hughes Joan of Arc Johannes Kepler
The CAPRICORN Man
"Don't keep him waiting, child! Why, his time is worth a thousand pounds a minute! And don't twiddle your fingers all the time ... Better say nothing at all. Language is worth a thousand pounds a word!"
He has a self-made brick wall around him. He's shy, but he's strong and tough. He's pleasant, but he's fiercely ambitious. Like the legendary, silent, earthy cowboy, the Capricorn man seems to prefer to be alone. He doesn't. Not really.
Secretly, Capricorn yearns for adulation. He'd love to thrill the crowd on a flying trapeze. In his private dreams, the goat is an incurable romantic, but Saturn chains his nature. The stern planet of discipline demands of him calm behavior, practical actions and serious intent. This is his cross, and it's often a heavy one to bear. Sometimes he'll cover his frustration with a brusque manner-and sometimes he'll startle you with unexpected and incongruous humor, although it will always be the ironic tongue-in-cheek variety. But that's often the funniest kind, and Capricoms can be quite a gas when they're wry and dry and juggling the jokes.
Turn a steady, dependable Capricorn male inside out, and you'll find a merry, gentle dreamer who longs for the free wind to blow through his hair and finds the sweet fragrance of compliments intoxicating-who hungers for excitement and thirsts for adventure. Only a chosen few can release this lonely soul from his secret prison.
Sun signs can be wonderfully helpful if you're inclined to judge a book by its jacket. Here you were thinking that Capricorn fellow would make a great school teacher but a miserable lover. You'd just about decided he'd rather be president than be yours. He impressed you as a man who would rather see his name written in the social register than in your diary. Now you discover that he has a heart as warm and friendly as a cozy wood fire on a winter night. I know it's exhilarating, but wait just a moment before yod dash off to give him a big bear hug and expect him to -fly you to the moon. Those surprises I just described are part of his inner nature. He'll be thrilled and impressed if you guess, but inner nature means just that-inner nature. Chances are he'll never let all those gauzy dreams of careless rapture escape and run around loose. Just so you know they're inside him. That's enough. Don't go expecting your Capricorn to dash barefoot through the buttercups. You can't change his basic. Saturnine personality.
What you can do, however, is laugh at his shaggy dog stories until he feels brave enough to tell more sophisticated tales. You can hint that you think there are banked fires beneath his conservative manner until he has the confidence to let a flame or two leap out. You can tell him you find his kind of dreams more colorful, because no dream is as bright as the one that really happens, so hell be encouraged to weave more of them. Someday, he will reach the top of his special mountain, and you'll be right there beside him, mighty proud of your determined goat-and mighty glad you believed in his practical dreams.
Capricorns pretend they can live without compliments, and the way they behave when they get one is pretty convincing proof. Did you ever say something nice to your Capricorn man and see it fall as flat as the expression on his face? Don't be hasty. Just because the goat is such an expert at fooling himself doesn't mean you have to be fooled, too. Actually, he desperately needs to be told he is good, clever, handsome, desirable and interesting, but since he'll seldom make his need visible, he gets few orchids. Consequently, he may be a little rusty, and won't know quite what to do when someone openly admires him, so he covers his embarrassment by making a wry joke or ignoring it, a reaction which can freeze people into deciding never to risk flattering that poker face again. The impression is created that he hates compliments, so he gets even fewer. It's a vicious circle. Maybe it's your fault more than his. Next time you give your Capricorn a verbal bouquet, look at his ears. See how pink they are? See that faint twinkle in his eye and how his nose twitches ever so slightly? He's as pleased as Sunday punch. Just because he doesn't dance a jig or roll in the grass like Leo, the lion, doesn't mean he hasn't been made deeply happy and ten feet taller. He needs to be seen as the truly great guy he is. Nature and the stars keep him from advertising. You'll have to be his press agent.
This man is what horticulturists would call a late bloomer. He's as serious as an owl in his youth, but he'll relax gradually as he matures, and if he's a typical Capricorn, he may end up as the youngest looking and acting man in the group. Now, that's a point well worth considering. With other men, you have to tolerate flighty foolishness for years and then look forward to a stuffy old age. With a Capricorn, you may have your enthusiasms smothered a bit at first, but just think what you have to look forward to! Your Capricorn lover won't run off to Paris with you in the spring of your romance, but he may take you to see the Taj Mahal by moonlight forty or fifty years later, when other men are complaining of creaking joints. It's not a bad switch. If you're the kind who likes to stuff yourself first with rich appetizers, and then dutifully have your vegetables, he's not for you. A love affair with a Capricorn man, provided it ends in marriage, is like having dessert last, where it belongs.
Naturally; the Capricorn reverse aging process may suggest to you that there's a catch in the faithfulness department. There is. It's true that youll have few worries about your goat straying when romance is young and dewy. It's also true that he may kick up his heels a little as he grows older. Still, with all that, he's a safer bet for fidelity than most other Sun signs, because the Capricorn man practically bums incense at the family altar. Whatever minor indiscretions he may contemplate when his late blooming begins, they'll never replace the home fires, the children and you. He's almost reverent about "family ties. That includes the family he's created with you and his own family, which has been the object of his devotion since childhood.
It wouldn't do to insult his mother or be cool to his brother. Be prepared to love your in-laws, even if they're about as lovable as prickly cactus. Not only will he defend them, but also if you allow disputes to get sticky, the strain of choosing between loyalties to two families can make him morose and gloomy. (If there's anything in this t world you don't want to do, it's make a Capricorn morose and gloomy.)
You may bump into a Capricorn who has open con- tempt for his relatives, or who has bitterly cut family ties and never looked back-but scratch the surface of his in- dependence and you'll find a deep, emotional wound in his past that originally caused such untypical behavior. Many Capricorn men live at home long past the age when their j friends are out enjoying the delights of a bachelor pad. j They usually fall in love later than most men too-and they seldom marry before they're settled in a career.
With an eye for pedigree and perfection, they'll look around pretty carefully. The goat will pick a girl who will be a good mother. Then she'll have to be a good cook and ' housekeeper. After that, she'll have to dress well to impress his business associates and friends, and preferably be a cut i above them in background, manners, breeding and intelli-J gence. Last of all, he'll make a quick check to see if she's I beautiful or if she appeals to his physical senses. You can see right away it's no big deal if your hair is droopy, your l perfume bottle is empty or your legs aren't the kind to ; make the current Miss Universe hate you. Just dig into the trunk for those D.A.R. papers and show him the family
Wedgwood. Take his mother to lunch once a week, and let him see how practical you are with your budget. Invite your four-year-old sister along on your next date. If you're an only child, rent a neighbor's toddler. Wipe her little nose gently and frequently with a proper linen handkerchief, talk about your desire to be on the mayor's committee for civic improvement, walk sedately, drop a few French phrases and gurgle when you see a baby in a buggy. Be sure to respect his father as the wisest gentleman you've ever met, and make casual references to your great uncle, who helped Carnegie build his empire-or your ancestor who fought by George Washington's side in the snows of Valley Forge (it doesn't matter which). If you're pretty, so much the better. But glamor will never replace that afghan you made for his cousin Bessie. I can almost promise that he'll never marry you if you don't pass inspection with his family. There are exceptions, of course, but they're so rare you'd be downright reckless to gamble that your Capricorn man is one of them.
After his family has proposed-or rather after he has proposed-put your foot down. Firmly. Let him know you love his folks dearly, but he's the one whose bed and board you've chosen to share. Otherwise, you'll spend many a Saturday night cooking dinner for his Uncle Charlie or helping his young sister through her painful adolescence.
Since Capricoms are always slightly nervous in the presence of the opposite sex, an occasional one will awkwardly hint at off-color situations, fumble with attempts at innuendo, or appear to be rough, tough and callous. It's just his way of being one of the fellows, a typical method of hiding his embarrassment and curiosity about the purple passions of more aggressive people. Don't ever let it lead you into thinking he wants you to play Bonnie to his Clyde. You are not Mae West or Texas Guinan. You are a lady and don't ever forget it. He may cast a furtive, interested glance at a lady of the evening, but she's definitely not the kind of lady he marries. This may sound like advice from your spinster Aunt Abigail, but if you think it's square, go on and wear your teeny bikini and green mascara- pour on the perfume and kiss him in public. You may eventually walk down the aisle in a white veil, but it wont be beside a Saturn groom.
A nice gift for your Capricorn husband would be a book of poems, the more romantic the better. If you don't train him early in the art of affectionate expression, you may become a well-provided-for wife who's adored and warmly appreciated-with a perfect dear for a husband-but who is also emotionally starved. It won't do any good by that time to complain that he never tells you he loves you. He'll just look at you in injured innocence or grumbling disgust (depending on how strong Saturn was at his birth), and patiently explain that "You're crazy. I distinctly remember telling you I loved you when I gave you your engagement ring and again when little Calvert was born."
He thinks you should know how he feels about you since be supports you, and pays you the tribute of allowing you to bear his children, sweep his floors and polish his trophies. To Capricorn, mushy, verbal declarations are gilding the romantic lily. He may ask, "What do you want, Richard Burton?" That's your cue to say "yes" loudly. It should startle him a little. He won't turn into Richard Burton, but he may be shocked into realizing that a gently murmured "sweetheart" at appropriate times won't harm his masculinity.
As a father, hell be a Father-the literal personification of the word. He'll always be at the head of the table, and that goes for picnics, too. Even if he's the one sitting on the poison ivy, near the ant hill, around the paper cloth spread under the trees-the spot where the Capricorn daddy sits is the head of the table. He'll demand respect and obedience, and hell insist on routine and discipline. But he'll repay it with honest devotion, even self sacrifice, probably approve of big, happy birthday parties and a very merry Christmas. Capricorn fathers are highly unlikely to spare the rod and spoil the child. He'll see that they go to the dentist and do their homework, with a few trips to the old woodshed when it's necessary. His own sense of organization and dependability will be emphatically conveyed. It certainly won't hurt the youngsters, though it might take a little starch out of them. Remind him that parenthood can be fun, as well as a serious responsibility. Think of him as a Charles Dickens type papa. Teach the children to give him generous goodnight kisses, and encourage him to take them to the ball game, fishing or swimming. If he's a little strict, remember that they'll profit in the long run, as long as he doesn't overdo it. When the grandchildren bounce on his knee, he'll turn shockingly permissive. Capricorn grandpas make great baby sitters.
I even know one who roller skates around the block with his second generation offspring.
A Capricorn man will seldom marry in haste and repent at leisure. He's more apt to marry at leisure and repent in haste. Most Capricorn marriages are solid, but if the goat makes a mistake, he'll walk out abruptly, and his wife won't get a second chance. Capricorn abhors divorce, so it won't happen often, but when it does, it's final. To be blunt, when he's had it-he has had it.
Your Saturnine husband may regulate love-making to a schedule, along with shopping, correspondence, doing his banking, visiting museums or art galleries and cleaning his gun and trophy collection. It may seem cold and unsentimental, but remember that the practical Capricorn is interested in the physical side of love long after other husbands resort to poetry to express their emotions. Interpreted, that means just what I said back at the beginning. Dessert last. After he's retired, he'll have more time to develop his technique of affection. That's better than insurance. And you'll have that too, with a Capricorn husband-insurance against a rainy day, insurance against loneliness and insurance against the blows of a sordid, ugly world. Any sensible female appreciates the value of Saturn devotion. He won't be a fiery lover who courts you with starry eyes and passionate, flowery speeches. But he'll protect you from all your feminine fears. He's a tough guy with a gentle heart. He'll chop the wood for that cozy fire, then sit with you in front of it and hold your hand tenderly. No matter how many gray hairs, extra pounds or wrinkles you add as the years slip by, to him you'll always look like the girl who made him say "I love you." When you stop to think about it, why should he say it again and again? Once is enough when it lasts that long.
The CAPRICORN Woman
So she got up and walked about-
rather stiffly just at first,
as she was afraid that the crown might come off:
but she comforted herself with the thought
that there was nobody to see her,
"and if I really am a Queen," she said,
as she sat down again,
"I shall be able to manage it quite well in time."
There's no such think as a typical Capricorn female. She can be a museum curator who wears granny glasses for real, or she can be a dancer who wears a glittering G-string for fun. You'll see her crisply running a suburban P.T.A., frying hamburgers in a coffee shop, or organizing the biggest Charity Ball in the city. A Capricorn woman may decorate the society columns, smile demurely behind a political candidate husband or pour mysterious liquids into test tubes. But whatever she's doing and whatever she's wearing, Saturn will rule her actions and her secret aims.
She can be ultra-feminine, flirtatious and charming enough to make a man feel like a giant grizzly bear who can protect her from the cold, cruel world. Or she can be icy, quiet and aloof, sitting securely on her marble pedestal and challenging you to be clever enough to win her superior hand. Whichever personality she projects, underneath her womanly wiles or her practical, sensible manner, she has the same goal-a steely determination to snag the right man, who can become important, make her proud and be a good father to her children.
So many Capricorn women are career girls, you might think love and marriage would always be a second choice. With love, you have a point. With marriage, no. The thing to understand is that the Capricorn goals are security, authority, respect and position. It makes little difference if these needs are supplied in front of a blackboard as a school teacher, behind a desk as an executive, or beside an ambitions husband whose social life and home she can manage with easy grace and careful planning. One way or another, the Capricorn woman will get her recognition. Some of them get it by writing books, lecturing, painting or composing music. It's surprising how many Capricorns of both sexes have unusual artistic talent. Perhaps it stems from an innate sense of balance and harmony, knowing what is pleasing and what is right or correct.
This is a little delicate, but even the Saturn females you find in burlesque theaters or engaging in the world's oldest profession (there will be only a handful) will end up by marrying the top comic or the theater owner in the first instance-or the wealthiest client in the second. The goat must climb. Whether the starting position is high or low, the top of the hill is where she finds the view more satisfying. There's nothing flashy about the Capricorn female. You'll certainly never see her loudly or obviously pushing and shoving for first place; you may even think she's docile enough to contentedly take a back seat to her competition.
Wait. See who gets the promotion.
Don't be misled into thinking she'll never sacrifice her career for marriage. Just give this girl half a chance to be a social leader and the mistress of a well-run household, and you'll see how quickly she loses interest in her job (one of the few things she'll do quickly). If you need her to, the Capricorn woman will gladly continue working to help you climb up the mountain of success-she won't be lazy. Otherwise, however, she's happier enjoying her position as your wife, provided the position is a good one, and there's enough financial security.
One of the most typical and delightful things about this woman is her natural breeding and grace of manner. You can meet a Capricorn girl who was raised in a one-room shack across the railroad -tracks, or whose father works the swing shift in a coal mine, but unless she decides to reveal her background (which she probably won't), you'll be convinced she comes from an old-line family, and was turned out by one of the best finishing schools. Such is the Capricorn built-in sense of social grace and conservative, conventional appearances.
Any man who's involved in a relationship with the female
goat should learn a basic fact about this Sun sign. She seems to be more even-tempered and emotionally steady than she actually is. Her manner may convince you that she's as firm as a rock and nothing can ruffle her calm surface. The truth is that she's subject to many moods. All women are subject to moods, you say, but the Capricorn girl can have some really black and long-lasting ones. If she feels mistreated or unappreciated, she'll brood for days, weeks, even months. She calls it being sensible or practical, but Saturnine gloominess, pessimism and depression are much more deeply rooted than that. They're triggered by fear of the future, worry about the present, shame over the past-or a suspicion that she's being made fun of or is inadequate in some way. These women do not accept teasing lightly. Keep it at a minimum. To be honest, they find it impossible to see the joke when they're the victims. You don't have to bury her in compliments constantly (she'll sense when they're insincere, anyway), but don't kid her about important matters, and praise her often enough to make her realize you know her true value.
It's hard for her to relax in romantic situations. There's plenty of physical desire under the cool Capricorn surface, far more than most people suspect, and it's never satisfied casually. Sitting around and wasting time with breathless hugs and ecstatic kisses while the future is still hanging unsettled is definitely not her favorite hobby-yet once she's decided you're the right man and the finances are secure or your ambition is sufficient, shell be as warm as a cuddly panda, affectionate, and even passionate. Capricorns don't believe in vague dreams that glide aimlessly through a misty, blue sky. They want to know where the ship of romance is taking them, and that it's sailing on safe waters. Build a firm foundation under your house if you plan to carry a Capricorn girl over the threshold. Make sure there's plenty of insurance and the mortgage is paid off or will be soon.
Shell probably be something of a social butterfly, extremely aware of etiquette, and she'll lean toward quaint customs like engraved napkin rings and needlepoint chairs. Things must be correct and tradition must be observed at all costs. She may have an inconsistent habit of wanting to shop in the most expensive, exclusive stores, yet insisting on a bargain. She doesn't mind buying a dress that's on sale, as long as it bears the right label.
Capricorn women have a fresh beauty of their own. You'll rarely find one who's not unusually attractive. Yet they are timid and unsure about their appearance, and you may find them needing constant reassurance that they're pretty. Although Capricorn females hate dishonesty in all forms, they're not above lying about their ages. They usually get away with it, too, thanks to the odd Saturn aging twist. They look like little old ladies as children, then bloom suddenly into women who look like young girls when they're past the prime of life.
It would be a terrible mistake to snub her family. The man who marries a Capricorn girl marries her relatives. There's no point in thinking that yours is different. She's not. Somewhere along the line, you'll stop laughing at mother-in-law jokes (you may cry instead). Many times, the Saturn female is the sole support of her family, financially or morally or both. She may care for an ill parent with devotion to the point of relinquishing the idea of marriage completely. Often, she'll enjoy the sacrifice because of her honest love for her family, but even if she resents it, her strong sense of responsibility and duty will not permit her to escape.
You might as well resign yourself to flattering your mother-in-law, and hope she's a great gal who's worth it. Don't argue politics with her father, and if you must criticize her brothers and sisters, see that the criticism is constructive, and based on a sincere belief in their potentialities. Frequently, Capricoms find themselves burdened with distressed or invalid relatives, and the typical goats will never let love, however consuming it might be, cause them to neglect such obligations. You'd better start right out by planning to have a guest room or two for visiting relatives. But there's a reverse benefit. You'll have a wife who is kind and considerate toward your own family. The Capricorn girl will understand if you have to allocate a fixed sum to your parents each week, and she'll probably be a companion to your brothers and sisters. She's the kind of girl you take home to meet mother, and mother approves of her immediately. Since men are so contrary, such instant encouragement can cause them to back away. It's always more fun to fight objections for your lady fair. But you'll only be slicing off your nose to spite your heart, because your mother is right. The Capricorn girl, if she's a typical Saturn woman, will make an excellent wife. The home of a Capricorn woman often looks so effortlessly spotless and smooth-running you'd think there were little fairies and elves hiding in the comers, working away furiously after midnight to shine and polish and cook and clean. Wrong. The very last place you can expect to find such imaginary creatures is around a Capricorn. The Saturn practicality and faith in firm facts ordinarily precludes any sympathy with the unseen. A Capricorn girl wouldn't believe in leprechauns if one sat right on the tip of her nose. In all fairness, however, although she may not be a way-out dreamer or a follower of occult mysteries, once she has the solid facts she's able to see the romance and poetry in the most ordinary situations.
Hers is an earthy kind of beauty that can make even the gross and ugly seem lovely with sheer usefulness. She's not a stranger to the gypsy spell of the north wind, nor is she deaf to the silver song of spring showers and the call of a lonely skylark. Great music stirs her deeply, and she's an enchanted patron of almost any art form. Perhaps she has to see and touch magic to believe in it. A leprechaun would probably get much further with her if he came right out and said where that pot of gold is hidden, instead of hinting about it in fairy tales.
Most Capricorns save their rainbow thinking for history and heroic deeds of the past. Since she worships tradition, and reveres those who have overcome obstacles to gain success, it's easier for her to get sentimental over the Gettysburg address than to get enthusiastic over your latest wild scheme. Actually, she's a true romantic, with greater imagination than the scatterbrains with unreal fantasies. Every January girl has haunting poetry in her soul, but she doesn't have much sympathy for poets who starve in attics. Take care of the food and rent and then pursue the dream, whatever it may be, is the Capricorn motto. Also make sure that the dream is worth pursuing. She sees nothing glamorous or magical about failure.
You may have to share your Capricorn wife with causes. She'll be a tireless worker for the poor and the defenseless, but she may prefer to show her charity in group efforts, rather than to individuals. Saturnine sympathies are usually organized, seldom scattered. Female Capricoms are natural leaders of women's clubs.
She'll probably instill both thrift and a respect for quality in the youngsters. She'll teach them to "Eat it up, wear it out, make it do or do without." Still, they'll be served the best cuts of meat, and she'll buy them the finest make of shoes. To her, economy does not have to mean cheap. The children will be expected to be polite to relatives and elders, and they'll probably learn excellent manners. They won't be pampered or allowed to willfully disobey. If you give her a book on child psychology, she may use it to paddle an unruly offspring and get around to reading it later. Sticky kisses may not be welcome, but few mothers are more devoted than the female goat. Her children will get a courteous listening ear. She may be a little strict and unsympathetic to their growing pains, but she'll be a fascinated audience for their achievements. The child who runs home from school and shouts, "Guess what I learned today," won't be ignored by the Capricorn mother, who will never be too busy to give her youngsters her interest and attention. After they become teenagers, there may be a few barriers when the Saturn conservatism clashes with youth's liberalism. At this point, she may need some help in understanding her children's enthusiastic dreams. She may leam the hard way that she can't dictate their friendships and confine them to "acceptable" people. But she's intelligent enough to adjust and pull in her horns if it looks as though she'll lose more than she'll gain.
Since many Capricorn females have sensitive skin, they don't wear much make-up. Lots of them are allergic to it. But nature rewarded them with natural beauty that needs little gilding, and they'll keep it long after the roses have faded from the cheeks of other women. Some of them startle you with lovely complexions, firm features and bright eyes at the age of eighty and older.
Patiently help your Capricorn woman overcome her lack of personal confidence. She's not unimaginative just because she doesn't court delusion. Try on a couple of her practical dreams for size, and you'll find they're surprisingly comfortable. Stubbornness may be one of her vices, but she's not a whiner or a nervous nag. She'll push you toward success, yet be tender and devoted. In spite of her modest, often gentle ways, she'll know just how to twist you around her little finger. There's a deep richness in her love that's more lasting than the brittle, scorching, demanding love of other women. Who says she doesn't believe in fairy tales? Only a wise Capricorn maiden could look deep into the eyes of an awkward frog and see that he's really a prince in disguise. Not only that-if you marry her, youll never run out of clean socks.
The CAPRICORN Child
"Oh, how I -wish I could shut up like a telescope! I-think I could, if I only knew how to begin ..."
"Pat her on the head, and see how pleased she'll be!... A little kindness- and putting her hair in papers- would do wonders with her-"
If you're one of those people mothers hate, because you think all newborn infants look like little old men and women, save your description for a Capricorn baby, and you won't get so much resistance. Tiny Capricorns do resemble miniature octogenarians. They look old in their youth and young in their old age. That little wrinkled prune of a face in the bassinet will someday be smooth and un-lined when other faces are sagging. Maybe it has something to do with being born in January-the old year going out and the New Year coming in. The odd turnabout does match the familiar image of the old man with his care-lined face beside the fresh infant of the New Year with his Ivory soap look.
If you have a Capricorn child, you'll notice the inconsistency soon enough. From the time he's an infant, your self-contained little Cappy will make you feel somewhat uneasy with his strange maturity. You'll say something cheerful to him, like "Does itty bitty Baby Boo want a nicey sugy cake?" and he'll give you a serious, thoughful look, exactly as though he's wondering just how silly you can get. It doesn't take many of those looks to shame the average parent right out of baby talk.
Capricorn youngsters are strong-willed and positive in their tastes, but they don't make a big fuss in expressing them. Your little goat won't throw a temper tantrum or dramatically pound his fist in the mashed potatoes, but heTl manage to communicate his negative reactions quite plainly. A mother may feel vaguely intimidated by a Capricorn baby, but she can't put her finger on the exact reason. Somehow he makes her feel-well, he makes her feel foolish and nighty. Let's be very truthful. He makes her feel like the child, instead of the parent.
This infant isn't the kind to waver or succumb to wishful thinking. He crawls or waddles deliberately to the place he wants to reach. You rather get the feeling he organized it all carefully in his mind while you were changing his diaper, and now he's going to follow through. He's nothing if not definite. Capricoms are never coy about making their wishes known. You get the message clearly. Then they steadily wait for your answer. Suppose you say "no." If it isn't anything important, he will probably accept the disappointment without tearful scenes. If it's something he's decided he really wants, he'll get it, one way or another. Your "no" will mean little to him. Instead of fighting it, he'll ignore it and bide his time until he finally wears you down and you give in.
As he grows older, your Capricorn offspring will begin to organize his life into a routine. He'll keep his toys in a certain place, and will be quite put out if you move them or disturb his system. If he's a typical Saturn child, hell usually adapt naturally to mealtime schedules and potty time, and he'll have less interest in childish tricks or youthful pranks than other youngsters. Even when they're very small, these boys and girls will show a decided preference for home life. The little goat would rather go on a picnic with mother and dad, or sit home and listen to the grown-ups talk, than run outside with a group of children his own age. He'll seldom have a gang of friends. There will probably be only a few close companions, or maybe just one special friend with whom he shares secrets.
School is seldom a struggle for young Capricorn students. Unless he has a conflicting ascendant or the Moon was in a restless sign at birth, this youngster will be remarkably responsible about homework. He will walk into the house, hang up his coat, and sit down immediately to tackle his lessons. If he's a true Capricorn, he can't enjoy his play until he's first attended to duty.
When he's ready for leisure, the Saturn play often takes the form of pretending to be an adult. Little Capricorn girls love to play dress-up in their mother's clothes. Sometimes they'll suggest, "You be the baby and I'll be the Mommy," which could make you a bit uncomfortable, because the tot will be strangely convincing in the reverse role. You'll feel like a complete fool, standing in the playpen and gurgling while she peers over her big spectacles, wearing your high heels and pearls, and says firmly, "Do be still or you'll go to bed without any supper." You get the impression you'd better stop the play quickly, or she really will put you to bed. Sometimes the Capricorn child will become a "pretend" parent for small pets and be quite serious about the responsibility. Little Capricorn boys like to pretend they're teachers, doctors, executives of big railroads or Daddy. When your little son puts on your husband's topcoat and picks up his pipe, you may get the oddest urge to ask him to drive over to the supermarket and bring home some eggs-until you remember he can't drive anything more complicated than a scooter, and he skins his knees most of the time on that. Capricorn children also like to paint or draw and listen to music, but they won't waste many leisure hours in aimless games. Frequently they'll be absorbed in making something practical. It will have a useful purpose, even if it's a pretty skinny pot holder or a comically wobbly pencil box. They should be encouraged to play outdoors. They won't seek the sunshine and fresh air with much enthusiasm, but it's good for them; it blows those gloomy little Saturn cobwebs out of their young minds.
Teachers usually find the Capricorn child pleasant to instruct, but they may lose patience with his slow, stubborn methods of learning. Still, the teacher will seldom complain of frivolous daydreaming or neglect of studies. These youngsters are normally very good scholars, after they've grasped the fundamentals. They don't leam quickly or project flashy brilliance, but they're thorough and careful. Saturn concentration is nothing to sneeze at. It wins prizes and gets A's.
When your young goat brings home a report card with behavior marks that say he's obedient, studious and reliable, but "he's reluctant to participate in class discussions," "refuses to recite," "is timid, lacks confidence and doesn't mix well with the other students," you'll begin to worry that you've raised an introverted bookworm, a hopelessly anti-social creature. Then one day your little Capricorn will casually mention that he has to be in school early to call the roll. "Why do you have to call the roll?" youll ask. The answer will be a shock. "Oh, because I'm President of the class." When you exclaim, "Why didn't you tell us?" he'll reply with offhand modesty, "Gee, it isn't that important." But he'll be blushing and pleased. It's the pattern for his adult life. Apparently slower than the others, supposedly a poor mixer and the dark horse, he'll quietly and inevitably end up in some position of leadership, as the extroverts realize he's the one they can trust to be responsible. Capricorn may be left to guard the treasures and keep the records, while the gregarious ones play and dream but he won't feel imposed upon. What he seeks are respect and authority.
An occasional Capricorn youngster will coldly dictate to weaker friends or siblings with a stubborn will, which can amount to childish cruelty, but far more often the Capricorn child will submit to more dominant Sun signs. There may then be a problem of brothers or sisters bossing the little goat, and you'll think he's being pushed around unfairly. Don't worry. He can take care of himself. One little Capricorn girl I know is completely submissive to her older, more aggressive Sagittarian sister. With the patience of the earth signs she takes orders from the more fiery personality. She never talks back or argues. But after an especially severe bossing session, the older sister just happens to find her shoes, her hairbrush or her favorite sweater is "missing." It always turns up eventually, and no one in the family ever has the slightest idea how it got "lost," but for weeks afterwards, the bossy sister is more considerate. Never underestimate the power of Capricorn for self-preservation. Somehow, the odds get evened.
Around members of the opposite sex, little goats will be bashful, but intensely interested. You'll hear remarks like, "Boys are drippy goons," and "Girls are stupid creeps," but they'll get mysteriously excited about Valentine's Day in school, and send a bushel of cards signed "guess who." Romantically, adolescence can be painful. They'll need encouragement and careful handling when dating begins.
It's a blessing to be the parents of a January boy or girl. With very few exceptions, it's like a gift from the gods. Unless he's pushed too far, in which case he can say something bluntly cruel and freezingly painful, the Capricorn child will usually be as sweet as the "sugy cake" he hates.
If you're short on the rent money you can always borrow a few twenties from his fat piggy bank. He'll be polite to his elders, and mind almost without being asked, except for rare stubborn spells. He'll organize his chores, and be serious about his future, though you may have to force him to scrub behind his ears. He'll cling to home and family with honest devotion, and seldom make you wonder where he is. Most of the time, he'll be right there beside you, enjoying every minute. He has his own bright, solid and practical dreams. Don't worry if he snubs Sleeping Beauty and Goldilocks. When you're old and gray, and feeling lost and forgotten by a thoughtless younger generation, your Capricorn son or daughter will sincerely respect your wisdom. He'll be enthusiastic about inviting you to visit or even to make your home with him. It's for all the world as if the Capricorn youngster is saying-for real this time-"All right, now I'll be the Mommy (or Daddy), and you be the baby. You took care of me with love. Now I'll take care of you." There'll be no make-believe about it, but Hans Christian. Andersen never wrote a happier ending,
The CAPRICORN Boss
"I told them once, I told them twice:
they would not listen to advice."
"Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry' Therefore I'm mad."
I know a Capricorn boss who's just about as typical of the Sun sign as you can get. He's the major domo of the world of a famous male singer from Hoboken. Few people know it. There are no neon signs spelling his name, and columnists don't print juicy tidbits about his activities. You'll never see his face on the cover of Time, but you may have to pass his inspection before you get the chance to try to sell any glamorous ideas to the Idol.
This goat sits firmly behind his desk, efficiently tying up all the loose ends and dangling strings in the amazingly intricate life of the famous personality. This can range from meeting the singer's relatives at the airport to buying a yacht or renting the floodlights for a premiere. He calmly handles hot potatoes like law suits and tax problems by delegating the right potato into the right accountant's or attorney's oven for baking, making sure it neither stays raw nor gets burned. His phone rings constantly with S.O.S. calls from other members of the widespread entourage; and he knows just who is where and why and when they're coming back. He keeps four million statistics in his head, including top secret information reporters would give an eye tooth to learn, the opening scene of a twenty-year-old movie, the box office figures of a current film, and the fastest source of catered hot spaghetti with Italian cheese sauce.
His day never ends. It starts at dawn, and midnight finds him winding up the schedule of orders he'll see are executed promptly the next morning. Often, he shaves, showers and dresses at the office. Anyone who really knows the score will tell you that certain bedlam would result if he ever disappeared from the frantic scene. He'd look grossly out of place in a discotheque, and he has a vaguely uncomfortable look in nightclubs, where duty demands he show his poker face on occasion.
This particular executive goat has a strange base of operations on an entire floor of a Manhattan building. In addition to the outer rooms and reception hall, there's a huge space for his private den. In one comer is a large circular desk for the mountain of papers that require his daily attention. The rest of his private domain is furnished with two big couches, several over-stuffed chairs, coffee tables, heavy draperies, lamps, book cases and mossy, cushioned carpeting. He even has a dining room, with a table big enough to seat the Mets for lunch, china closets, mirrors, dishes, silver and glasses. The walls are covered with patterned paper, and there are several tanks of expensive tropical fish lining the room. You would think you were in somone's home instead of in the busy office of an important executive.
That's exactly where you are. Since he must spend so many hours away from his home, this Capricorn boss simply brought it with him. Other bosses may enjoy the commercial world, and be glad to get away from home, but not the goat. Home is sacred. At almost any hour, youll find this particular Capricorn's relatives around. Family life is never neglected for business.
Since he's such a typical Saturn boss his habits tell a lot about all Capricorn executives. He's a kindly father image to those who work for him-stern, but fair. He insists on obedience to duty, and woe betide the employee who forgets to feed his velvet-tailed guppies. He seldom raises his voice to give orders. His tone is gruff, but normally quiet, except on rare occasions when stupidity or careless mistakes cause him to bellow. At these times, he resembles a glaring Monty Woolley. Visitors are sometimes intimidated by his serious, formal manner, but the staff has discovered his soft heart, and they'll brook no criticism of him from outsiders-though they may swear a little under their breath, among themselves, when he cracks the whip. He bums their ears off when they goof, but he comes up with an extra fifty when it's needed, and he'll send his secretary's mother flowers in the hospital. He seldom goes in for compliments or flattery. A mumbled "Yeah, that's good," is about as close as he comes to extravagant praise. But he's a sympathetic listener to his employees' personal troubles, and he makes sure they eat right and wear their boots when it's raining. The staff is like a family, with the Capricorn boss unquestionably the head of the house.
He doesn't hand out Christmas bonuses like Santa Claus, but he's not stingy when an employee gets stuck in Las Vegas on a vacation without the plane fare home, or when the guy Friday he keeps hopping like a jack rabbit has a doctor's bill that can't be paid on his salary. (In the Vegas instance, he'll wire the return trip ticket, rather than the cash, and it will be tourist class. Wastefulness is not one of his hobbies.)
Although he's gruff, he can also be gentle and timid. A compliment will turn his ears pink, though he'll seldom acknowledge that he even heard it. Charity solicitors can always get a check from him, and if the charity is connected with children or the old folks, he'll add an extra zero. He has to be reminded to rest and eat his lunch, since responsibility causes him to neglect his personal needs. Now and then he goes into a black, melancholy mood of Saturnine depression, closes his door, stares out the window on Central Park, and no one dares disturb his privacy. Phone calls are held and office problems kept on ice until the depression lifts. He dresses in conservative, dark colors and subdued styles, and he has a sort of grandfatherly-looking pocket watch he frequently consults. He really looks more as though he's connected with a staid bank than with the leading swinger of these swingin' times. Most of the bric-a-brac around his desk are antiques, and there's a generous sprinkling of faded photos of his wife, children and various, assorted relatives.
That's a simon pure picture of a Capricorn boss. If you keep the image in your mind, you'll have a pretty good idea what to expect from any Saturn executive including your own. If he has any spare time, he won't waste it. He'll expect you to imitate him. Is the switchboard quiet? Good. You'll have time to file those letters. Is the schedule light today? Pine. You can move those cartons in the stock room. Don't spend office time polishing your nails, if you're his secretary-and don't hang on the phone in the back office, talking with your girl, if you're a male employee. Your Saturn boss will materialize out of thin air, like a frowning, avengeful genie. It wouldn't be wise to have your beatnik brother with the beard and guitar visit you at the office. Even the goat's religious devotion to family ties-his own and yours-won't keep him from raising a conservative eyebrow of disapproval. Female employees who reek of perfume and male employees who practice putting in the conference room won't find the office of a Capricorn executive a happy home. As far as he's concerned, the place for heavy perfume is in the bottle, and the place for putting is on the golf course (preferably at the best country club).
He's always impressed with the status of those who have inched a few toeholds above him on the mountain of success, so you'll make a hit if you're familiar with the social register. If you didn't graduate from Vassar or Harvard, then for goodness sakes at least have an aunt or uncle who did.
Make sure he knows you take your mother to lunch every Wednesday, or that you pay your younger brother's tuition at prep school, and you're sure to get promoted. Clean fingernails, courteous manners and perfect grammar are necessities, and efficient work without whining or complaints will be a requirement. Never call him by his first name in front of strangers, and never breathe a word of criticism about his family in front of anybody. For Christmas, give him a chipped and faded oil painting of Thomas Jefferson you picked up in an antique shop, or a rock you snitched last summer from the back door of Nancy Hanks' birthplace. Capricoms revere history and the past. Just don't tell him you snitched the rock. They also revere scrupulous honesty. Polishing apples won't get you ten cents extra in your pay envelope. But understanding his lonely heart will gain you his confidence. Others may see him as a firm, tough disciplinarian with a heart of stone. Let him know you see him for what he really is:
a shy and sensitive soul, who secretly longs to be free and casual, but knows he's chained by Saturn's demands of obedience to order, system and authority. He'll treat you like a son or daughter. You'll get spanked when you're bad and rewarded when you're good. But he won't let you down when you're in trouble or lock the door when you need help. Just don't forget to feed those velvet-tailed guppies.
The CAPRICORN Employee
"If everyone minded their own business,' said the Duchess, in a hoarse growl, "The world would go round a deal faster than it does."
Look around the office and see if you can spot him. No fair sneaking a look at the birthdays in your personnel records. You can forget about that original, creative fellow with the bushy sideburns and the antler tooth necklace. You can also cross off the sport who brags about his pub cruising capers and his candlelight conquests. They're not Saturn types.
Jolly George, who keeps the staff in a state of perpetual panic with his not-quite-practical jokes, definitely isn't a Capricorn. Neither is light-hearted Louie, with the glib tongue and the bouncing baby brainstorms-nor the new promotion manager with the orange silk ascot, who keeps humming "My Father Was the Keeper of the Eddystone
Light" in sales meetings.
How about that busy worker with the reserved manner who wears suspenders and parts his hair in the middle? The one with the quiet socks and a picture of his family in an ostrich leather frame on his desk. He usually comes in a few minutes early and leaves a few minutes late. His head is fastened firmly to his shoulders, and his pencil points are always sharp. The staff calls him "Sir," salesmen call him "Mister," and you call him when there's trouble. Of course he's a Capricorn.
Who else could you load up with a pile of work that would stagger a horse-but not a goat? He's your dependable safety valve when things get snarled and disorganized, and he comes through for you without making a big fuss about it. I doubt if he ever dashes into your office. He walks in, and he probably checks first to see if you're busy. His clothes and manner are both conservative, and he's the only one in the bunch who never gets caught without his umbrella when it rains. He won't lose his brief case in the subway, or forget where he left his lunch. His lunch? Naturally. What else do you think he carries in that brown paper bag? Restaurants are expensive. Besides, he hates to tip and fight the crowds.
The last time you saw him flash a bright, toothpaste grin was when your secretary mentioned she didn't know how the office could run without him. He's not the grinning type. Or the foolish, frivolous type. He may tell quite a few jokes in his wry and dry way, or take a discreet peek at a pretty girl, but Saturn will never permit him to pull out all the stops. Most of the time, he minds his own business. The Capricorn is more inclined to frown sternly 00 the casual jollities of the gay extroverts than to join them, although his own brand of cynical humor can be hilarious. When he's in form, it's hard to top him.
You have to admit he has unique and valuable assets. Your Capricorn employee is the one you sic on the tough, suspicious Internal Revenue man. When the goat gets through with him, he's not as suspicious and far less tough. He may even be courteous and respectful. It's not everyone who can successfully intimidate a tax man. Remember that high pressure character who wanted to sell you several hundred dollars worth of perfumed typewriter ribbons in rbinestone studded boxes to pep up your secretaries' morale? After two minutes with your Capricorn man, the poor soul was pressing the down button on the elevator, looking like a fallen souffle.
Somehow, you get the impression your Capricorn employee is going to advance much higher in life, but it's hard to figure how he conveys it. There's nothing aggressive or openly ambitious about him. He's not a flashy, ruthless climber. Let's try that again. He's not a flashy climber. In his own mild, inconspicuous way, the goat is coldly determined to get where he's going. Those who prevent his steady progress or impose on him will soon find he's no Casper Milquetoast. Hell accept his responsibilities without complaint or resentment, but he won't be pushed too far. Capricoms with severe planetary afflictions in their natal birth charts can be astonishingly cruel and ruthless. But the average goat simply gives people a grumpy growl and a black look when they tweak his horns.
! Just in case you have one of the exceptions to the rule in your office, I'd better tell you about a Capricorn I knew who worked in a donut shop. He probably had a Leo ascendant or the Moon was in Gemini or Aries when he was born. This goat wore expensive, Italian shoes and big cuff links. He made more romantic conquests in a week than other men do in a lifetime-or said he did. He enjoyed telling off-color stories, and when he wasn't flirting with the women customers or impressing everyone with his toughness, he tossed off some pretty big bubble schemes and way-out promotions. Most people would never peg him as a Capricorn, but they should look a little closer and listen more carefully.
For all his outrageous flirting, when he called his fiancee on the phone his tone was tender and protective. A man who dared to swear in her presence would never have tried it twice. He made it clear that she was a lady. In front of his parents, he was subdued and respectful. Anyone past fifty he treated with a courtesy bordering on reverence. With children, he was as gentle as Whistler's mother. Powerful, famous people with status turned him into a humble, worshiping admirer. He was constantly telling friends and strangers that he once sat next to a glamorous movie actress on a plane or about the time he was invited to a reception at the Governor's mansion. Everything he bought was wholesale, including those Italian shoes. He had the undisputed first prize as the tightest tipper in town. A dollar would never be spent where a dime could be saved. In other words, underneath that false bravado was a typical Saturn nature. This apparently aggressive, extroverted goat turned pink at a compliment and painfully shy in the presence of anyone he thought was upper register. If you need any more proof that he was a Capricorn, he eventually bought the chain of donut shops. And by the way, he didn't risk his own cash on those wild promotions. It was always somebody else's.
The typical Capricorn employee is conscientious almost to a fault. If he makes a mistake or commits an error of judgment, he's miserable. Falling down on his job depresses him. He'll come back to the office and work overtime if you need him, but he won't like it if you make him miss dinner at home with his family too many nights. The goat prefers to tend to his domestic responsibilities first, and return later to the grindstone, if necessary. You won't find him changing jobs often. The Capricorn decides early what the goal will be, and pursues it with unswerving persistence. He is not flighty or undecided about his future. The top of the mountain is never allowed to be obscured by the mist of fanciful dreams and sentimental wishing. Titles usually don't move him. He's not seeking glory. He's after the real position of power: he wants to be the one who guards the fort while the individualists and great idealists are out chasing butterflies. He doesn't need his name in gold letters on the door to feel important. But don't fail to increase his area of responsibility at decent intervals, and make sure you pay him enough money so be can keep up with the Joneses. He has to live in the right neighborhood, send his children to the right schools, and his wife has to dress with more taste than her friends. That takes substantial lettuce. The goat will gladly chew on tough leather, pieces of steel and old light bulbs to earn his dessert of green paper lettuce, sprinkled with the caviar of social distinction. His banker may be his closest friend, next to the members of his immediate family.
Your female Capricorn employee follows the same path as the male up that mountain. Nothing sways her from her determination to seek a position of authority in the firm or marry the boss. It doesn't matter a lot which it is. As long as she comes out ahead. This woman won't wear two sets of false eyelashes or jangling bracelets to work and you'll never catch her spinning daydreams at her desk. he lady goat is a Lady. She'll rarely raise her voice or [ indulge in girlish gossip. There are more important things on her mind than who is having an affair with whom and what Emily said about Marilyn getting back late from lunch. After office hours, she may show a little more curiosity. The Saturn woman sometimes lives vicariously on the details of other people's romances, but she usually won't indulge herself in discussing them on the boss's time. That's logical enough. The boss may someday be her husband. In all fairness, there's another reason. All goats S have a serious sense of duty, a respect for their superiors, I and an inner discipline which makes them abstain from office monkeyshines.
Your Capricorn employees of either sex will be businesslike. They disapprove of people who are late to work, and who waste time in idle chitchat. They have no patience with methods that aren't sound or procedures that lack common sense, and they'll rearrange office systems to make sure the organization runs with sensible efficiency. Not all Capricoms are bankers, teachers and bookkeepers. They also make excellent researchers, extremely capable dentists, brilliant engineers and architects, and they're clever at merchandising, manufacturing and politics. Many goats are jewelers, ministers, hotel managers, funeral directors, art dealers or anthropologists, but whatever the occupation, they'll be serious about it.
Don't forget that there's a creative side to Satum people. Your Capricorn employee may have a hobby that could surprise you. He could be a Sunday artist, and a very good one, too. He could be a weekend musician, dabble in sculpture, sell real estate, apply his green thumb to a garden, sing in a choir or belong to a drama class. Culture is close to his heart. So is Mother Earth. His real loves are his family, his home, his work, money, prestige, books, art and music in just about that order. Get an Aries, Leo, Gemini or Sagittarius employee to travel for your firm. Most Capricoms break out in a nervous rash at the sight of a suitcase. Even if it's not quite that bad, they'll be happier catching a commuter train than catching a jet. Anyway, who would keep things nailed down while he's away? Remember what happened when he took his vacation last summer. Someone in the office went ahead and ordered four dozen of those perfumed typewriter ribbons in the rhinestone studded boxes.
'Twos brillig, and the stithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves, And the mome raths outgrabe.